My Story

Hi, my name is Justin. I’m Catholic and gay. I spent over a decade of my life actively volunteering and working in the Catholic world. I’ve spent countless hours studying and promoting the Catholic Church’s teachings, especially those surrounding sex and marriage. In 2014, I started an outreach program at the University of Wisconsin-Madison to help build bridges between those who identified as LGBTQ+ (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer) and wanted to explore the Catholic faith. Additionally, I organized discussion groups to explore how missionaries could engage with this community more constructively.

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For most of my life, I fervently agreed with the Catholic Church’s teaching on sex and marriage, all while keeping my sexuality a secret from most of my friends and all of my family. Prompted by spiritual directors, priests, and mentors, I sought to understand the root causes of my desires and ultimately pursued reparative therapy to make myself straight. For all my efforts to remain obedient to the Church’s teachings and draw close to Jesus, I was left with profound feelings of isolation and shame.

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In the fall of 2018, I started questioning the Catholic Church’s teaching of homosexuality. I spent the next year diving deeply into the genetic, cultural, and psychological causes of homosexuality, bisexuality, and (to a smaller extent) gender dysphoria (GD). I read every document I could find by the Vatican and the USCCB (United States Council of Catholic Bishops) on homosexuality. I sought to understand the connection between the scriptural, historical, and psychological arguments against homosexuality that Catholicism makes. I also studied the societal impact of the pro-LGBT policies within the United States and how the decision to legalize same-sex marriage impacted families, communities, and the children of these parents.

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Through all this, I slowly realized I disagreed with aspects of Catholicism, but I still wanted to remain a part of the Church. However, as I started accepting who I was and coming out to more friends and my family, I realized there just wasn’t room for me in the Church I experienced. I wish I could say that I had an isolated experience, but after years of hearing and sharing countless stories of hurt, rejection, and isolation from queer individuals, I knew I needed to do something.

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As someone entrenched in conservative Catholicism for so long and now deeply involved in queer Christianity and the gay community, I have a deep understanding of both sides. I can say that both sides have wrong perceptions of the other, and both have caused harm. After speaking with and interviewing a wealth of individuals on these topics from both affirming and non-affirming positions, I know that many Catholics want to understand how to engage in this topic with more compassion and sensitivity. Likewise, many people who identify as LGBTQ+ or who experience same-sex attractions or gender dysphoria love the Church.

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LGBTQ+ and Catholic. These two communities do not need to see each other as enemies. So, I am here as a bridge-builder. I am here to share stories from my life and those close to me, ask questions, help people reflect, and challenge each of us to love better. I want us to love not in the way we want but in how others need. 

It is not enough that you love the LGBT community they must know that they are loved. ​